11:21 <VoxPVoxD> <i've been thinking> 11:21 <VoxPVoxD> <about your Sartorial Challenge> 11:21 <VoxPVoxD> <do you have a free afternoon on the weekend> 11:22 <tom> BG: <what> 11:22 <tom> BG: <do i have to fight another elf or something> 11:23 <VoxPVoxD> < 11:23 <VoxPVoxD> 👒 11:23 <VoxPVoxD> 🕷 11:23 <VoxPVoxD> 👗 11:23 <VoxPVoxD> > 11:24 <tom> BG is typing... 11:24 <tom> BG: <right yeah just testing you> 11:25 <tom> BG: <its hard to find dresses with six arms> 11:26 <VoxPVoxD> <so, i have two proposals. question: how important is surprising mari with a hat/dress combination in your mental picture of the gift-giving Experience> 11:28 <tom> BG: <shes on like her last vacation ever before shes gotta start doing dr. shit and i wanna surprise her> 11:31 <VoxPVoxD> <ok! in that case i will call an Old Friend. the non-surprise thought i had was that you could take mari down to london and make a day trip of couture shopping, fancy meats, a nice hotel, Etc. but that's less about Surprise and more about Sharing Time> 11:31 <tom> BG: <oh man do you guys have nutjobs threatening to bomb hospitals over ivermectin here> 11:31 <VoxPVoxD> <???> 11:31 <VoxPVoxD> <what is ivermectin> 11:31 <tom> BG: <nvm> 11:32 <VoxPVoxD> <dont tantalise me Goreman> 11:33 <tom> BG is typing... 11:33 <tom> BG: <sometimes i think stuff that happens in america should stay in america. you know. keep the disease contained.> 11:34 <tom> BG: <anyway its like how people were making their kids drink bleach to cure autism but for covid> 11:34 <VoxPVoxD> https://i.imgur.com/NLPDT6A.gif 11:34 <VoxPVoxD> Pause. 11:34 <VoxPVoxD> https://i.imgur.com/NLPDT6A.gif 11:35 <VoxPVoxD> <blimey> 11:35 <tom> BG: <dont try to make sense of it> 11:35 <tom> BG: <whose your Old Friend> 11:36 <VoxPVoxD> <andy works in design and knows every good tailor in england and wales> 11:37 <VoxPVoxD> <theres bound to be one or two in manchester> 11:38 <tom> BG: <oh btw theyre still drinking bleach too> 11:38 <tom> BG: <not me though> 11:38 <tom> BG: <keeping covid at bay with the power of nicotine> 11:39 <VoxPVoxD> <for your 'ealth> 11:40 <VoxPVoxD> <pick you up at 2?> 11:40 <VoxPVoxD> <you can buy me dinner after. im skint for Some Reason> 11:41 <tom> BG: <owned> 11:42 <tom> BG: <ya sounds good> 11:43 <VoxPVoxD> <🔥 THIS PACT IS SEALED 🔥> 11:43 <tom> BG is typing... <is that actually a thing> 11:43 <VoxPVoxD> No response. 11:43 <tom> BG: <you really gotta specify these days im in so many oaths> 11:43 <tom> He drops it. 11:43 <VoxPVoxD> Now who's being tantalised?? 11:44 <VoxPVoxD> Where is Willie meeting Bob on a tory-faced Saturday (cold, gray, blustery, threatening rain that never quite seems to come)? 11:47 <tom> Bob's standing outside Empanading with his hands in his pockets, trying to stay warm. 11:47 <tom> How can it be so cold if it's not even snowing?? 11:48 <VoxPVoxD> Then Willie rolls up in her vintage 1980s automobile, in scarf, shawl, and sunglasses. She waves through the window with a leather-gloved hand and beckons Bob in. 11:49 <tom> "Welcome to the aviators club, Willie." 11:49 <tom> He lowers his glasses enough to give her a wild look. "No going back now." 11:49 <tom> He slides into the seat and warms his hands over the air vents. 11:51 <tom> "...I am gonna be so mad if she survived all this stupid bullshit to get this far and some dickhead gives her covid." 11:51 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "I have so much farther to fall. I'm excited." A small frown. "I was hoping the weather'd relent enough that we could walk a bit, but between the cold and the quantum prospect of rain... it felt unwise. And we mustn't do unwise things, yeah?" 11:52 <tom> "That's what they keep saying," Bob mutters. 11:52 <tom> "So far I'm just throwing myself at the mercy of the prettiest girl in the room and... I'm not dead yet?" 11:53 <VoxPVoxD> "Justice and mercy are human dreams; they do not concern the birds or the chicks or Eternal Mom." 11:53 <VoxPVoxD> Mom with an 'o' sounds so weird in her accent. 11:54 <tom> "Are you gonna be okay with Shaw hustling you outta your lunch money like that?" 11:55 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "I do have a proper job, Robert. I just, you know, can't pay down the principal on my mortgage ahead of schedule quite yet." 11:58 <tom> "I really need to get WASC citizenship so Suzie will stop invading my brain. It keeps happening." 11:59 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "Did it feel weird?" 11:59 <VoxPVoxD> "I'm incredibly curious." 12:00 <VoxPVoxD> And a bit jealous, honestly! 12:02 <tom> "Hmmm..." Bob's quiet for a second. "When Sergio did it, it was more like... deleting and being pasted over. Liam's was more like shuffling my emotions around- oh yeah I almost beat the shit out of Rolf, that happened- but Suzie was pretty up front about just dissecting my brain." 12:03 <tom> "It's like, yeah okay lady, good luck getting anything useful here." 12:03 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "That sounds very intimate." 12:06 <tom> Bob rubs the back of his neck. "You know she was one of Alex's... you know... also." 12:06 <tom> "Everything I'm learning out here is making me real pissed off." 12:06 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "Yeah, I remember her name on the chart. She didn't seem to hold us letting Ruth live against us. At least not outwardly." 12:07 <tom> "Which is weird after Ruth tried to cut her up so Mr. Gardener wouldn't- ah, fuck." 12:07 <tom> "No point in getting bogged down." 12:07 <VoxPVoxD> "So did she go right for the pervert stuff or did she at least try to do something useful first?" 12:08 <tom> Bob laughs: "Willie, it's all pervert stuff in here." 12:08 <tom> "Good luck, Suzie!" 12:10 <tom> "...I may have uh, kinda just... slipped some stuff... they don't prepare you for Brain Warrior shit in FORT, okay! We're not VASCU!" 12:10 <VoxPVoxD> Willie laughs. "I kind of wish she'd invaded my mind. I want to know what it's like! But I doubt I have your psychic fortitude." 12:10 <VoxPVoxD> "Well yeah! OPFORT wasn't about fighting vampires, was it?" 12:10 <VoxPVoxD> "It was like... Alien vs. Redditor." 12:11 <tom> Oh no she's learning. Bob: "Sometimes vampires try to get in on that game too." 12:11 <tom> "It's never good." 12:11 <VoxPVoxD> "Bedroom abductions are a hotly contested branding space." 12:12 <VoxPVoxD> Willie's got music on, though it's low enough to talk over. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hL8mZrEfrxg 12:13 <tom> Bob's watching grey figures pass on the pavement out the window. "I'm telling you, if we could just honeypot the elves with some claymores on the bedroom window, it could do a lot of good." 12:14 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "Whose window, is the question." 12:14 <VoxPVoxD> "Now, have you got pictures of the hat?" 12:15 <VoxPVoxD> "What about Mari's measurments?" 12:15 <VoxPVoxD> "Maybe I should get those from Councillor Cutsworth." 12:16 <tom> Bob: "When you put it like that it makes her sound kinda unprofessional, doesn't it? Think I could just file a complaint?" 12:16 <tom> Bob's got his phone out, with a picture of a boater and a note file of measurements (in imperial, for some fucking reason) 12:17 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "I don't think you have the standing, legally. And whatever she saw wasn't enough to get her to mark us as anathema to the night-city. I think it's better if we, as they say, take the L." 12:19 <VoxPVoxD> "Good! Good. Andy's called ahead to someone she respects. Neeta Carpenter. She'll do right by us. Andy's pride wouldn't allow any other outcome." 12:22 <VoxPVoxD> "I've got to ask, though, before we get there: how did you scare Kaga so badly? He's been totally silent for most of a week now." 12:22 <tom> Bob scowls. 12:24 <tom> "Maybe he just likes me?" 12:24 <tom> "Can, can you just order him not to be a creepy night pervert?" 12:24 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "I really wish you'd stop saying such unkind things about yourself." 12:24 <VoxPVoxD> "I could. It feels cheap, though." 12:25 <tom> "I gave him a lot of bac'n biscuits. Maybe he's turning a new leaf." 12:25 <tom> Bob is tapping the seat's armrest. 12:25 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "Did you try to talk to him or did you just treat him like a big dog?" 12:25 <VoxPVoxD> "Maybe that's been my error..." 12:26 <tom> "Shit, I already talk to regular dogs all the time." 12:29 <tom> Bob grinds his teeth. "Oh you know, I tried- you know, I don't just wanna be a dick, I tried to do dog stuff with him, but he didn't... he didn't like fetch." 12:29 <tom> "Didn't like playing with other dogs, really..." 12:30 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "He loves playing with other dogs. It's the reverse that doesn't hold." 12:30 <VoxPVoxD> "If you really want to paralyse him, bring him within sight of children." 12:31 <tom> "I don't know if it would be... I mean what if he like flips out..." 12:31 <VoxPVoxD> "I'm not sure he can. It might be adjacent to the silver bell bane. The voice of a child, I mean. But he's had... many opportunities, and he just sort of sits there." 12:32 <tom> "What if the dude just has standards and we're not giving him credit?" 12:32 <tom> "Like maybe that's his red line?" 12:33 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "At a certain level of depravity, 'standards' are just an aesthetic flourish." 12:33 <VoxPVoxD> "Anyway, I won't pry. Keep your Dog Secrets. If it were really heinous I'm sure Kaga would relish telling me." 12:33 <tom> Bob: "That's Vie thinkin' right there." 12:33 <VoxPVoxD> "But he's even been leaving me alone at night. It's.., weirdly lonely, honestly." 12:33 <tom> "It's like uh..." 12:34 <tom> Bob stops himself from saying how sad that makes him. 12:34 <VoxPVoxD> "You're making that face." 12:34 <tom> "I wasn't really afraid of Suzie reading my mind, right." 12:34 <VoxPVoxD> "Right." 12:34 <tom> "It's like, she doesn't really give a shit. She knows I'm some fuckhead, there's gonna be dumb thoughts in there. If she wants she can just tear my face off anyway." 12:35 <tom> "So we know the score. There's like.... an implicit understanding that I'm just a frog she can step on." 12:35 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "The old adage that the test of character is how you treat your inferiors." 12:37 <tom> Bob: "Maybe Kaga's just mellowing out...?" 12:37 <tom> "Hopefully?" 12:37 <VoxPVoxD> "...maybe." 12:38 <VoxPVoxD> Honestly, Willie's even more suspicious now. Will she stoop to ordering Kaga to speak to her? It's on the table. 12:38 <VoxPVoxD> "Ah! Here we are." 12:38 <tom> Bob sighs in relief. 12:39 <VoxPVoxD> They're just on the periphery of the city centre, where neat little shops rub shoulders with empty storefronts and soulless looking chains. Willie parks and leads Bob beneath a sign that reads 'Danger by Design'. 12:43 <VoxPVoxD> A bell tinkles overhead as she opens the front door. The shop is empty of customers, full of racks of clothes and rolls of fabric, kind of mod-ish mid-century art on the walls. It smells of bergamot. 12:43 <tom> Bob follows her in. 12:43 <tom> What the heck is bergamot?? 12:43 <VoxPVoxD> Bitter orange. It's like the smell of Earl Grey tea. 12:44 <tom> What is wrong with this fucking country? 12:44 <VoxPVoxD> Fuck off. 12:45 <tom> Bob smiles politely at anyone brave enough to man a retail position at the front of the store. 12:46 <VoxPVoxD> "Hello hello?" This is Willie's call. The response comes from a back room, as a very attractive, well-dressed woman around Willie's age emerges, sizing Willie up instantly. "Lady Wellesley! What a pleasure. Andy's told me ever so much about you. I'm Neeta, of course. Is this the man?" 12:46 <VoxPVoxD> There's no one working the register. 12:46 <tom> Oh no. 12:46 <VoxPVoxD> Willie smiles back. "Oh yes. This is my friend Bob. He's looking for a gift for his girlfriend. Do be gentle; not only is he a man, he's American." 12:47 <tom> "Hi Neeta," Bob sighs, crushed: "I need a dress to go with a boater. Like this," he holds up his phone after double-checking to make sure he remembered to close the other tabs. Good god. 12:47 <tom> "I got her measurements... just ignore the duplicates for the arms..." 12:49 <VoxPVoxD> Neeta reacts like she's just heard someone's terribly ill. "Oh, baby. Don't worry, Bob. I'll take care of you." She takes the phone and squints at it. "Quite a wide brim, I like the pearls-and-branches thing. This is a lovely piece. Inherited?" 12:52 <tom> Bob blushes a bit at that. "Got it at a sale. They didn't know what they had on their hands." 12:52 <tom> "Soo... I don't know, what goes with that, like, a sundress?" 12:53 <VoxPVoxD> Neeta: "The dress is only one piece of the puzzle. It doesn't just have to match the hat. It has to match the woman." 12:53 <VoxPVoxD> "Tell me about her." 12:55 <tom> Bob, not getting it: "She's about this-" he holds his hand out, palm flat, "tall, uhm, brown hair... olive skin..." 12:57 <VoxPVoxD> Neeta is just about Bob's height, but somehow she manages to look over his head at Willie, who gives a little 'he's like this' nod. "Useful information! But not quite what I'm after. I'm not asking you to file a police report, Bob. What is she like? What's her vibe? How does she typically dress? Where do you see her seeing herself in this hat?" 12:57 <tom> "Oh," 12:58 <tom> "She's..." Bob takes off his visor and folds it, rubs the bags under his eyes. 13:00 <tom> "She likes to dissect her sandwiches into piles of components. She lets me put my head on her lap while she's watching tv, and tries to compress herself down into a corner if anyone tries to talk to her at a party. She's just... the cutest person... and she doesn't even know it." 13:01 <tom> Bob squints, furrows his brow: "World Record hugging champion." 13:02 <tom> "I want her to look in the mirror and see she's the prettiest there is..." 13:04 <VoxPVoxD> Willie would ordinarily grin here, behind Bob's back. Instead she's thinking, he's such a sap... 13:06 <tom> Bob's wringing his hands nervously. 13:07 <tom> "My girl's had a real rough go of it... I just want her birthday to be different this time." 13:09 <VoxPVoxD> Neeta: "Okay. I'm hearing... shy, a bit nerdy, sweet - to you, at least. I'm stepping into my mind-palace... racks of dresses are whooshing by me like in the Matrix... I see three possibilities. Three scenarios. Transportive. A picnic, a regatta, a day in the woods." 13:10 <tom> Bob, whispering to Willie: "Regatta?" 13:11 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "A day on the water, watching boats race." 13:11 <tom> "Oh, nice." 13:11 <VoxPVoxD> Neeta: "Where do you want her to see herself when she sees herself in this hypothetical dress?" 13:12 <tom> Bob: "Beach episode." 13:12 <tom> "Every show's gotta have one." 13:12 <tom> "She's the star, obvi." 13:13 <VoxPVoxD> Neeta: "Naturally. Does she like green?" 13:15 <VoxPVoxD> "Or perhaps something more golden?" 13:16 <tom> Bob: "This isn't gonna be like that one dress that destroyed the internet, right?" 13:16 <tom> "Uh I think green's.... fiiine?" 13:16 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "She wore a green ribbon to tea once, and looked very good." 13:18 <tom> Oh, shit, she's right! "Yeah, of course," 13:26 <tom> Bob leans on the wall and puts his hands in his pockets, very pointedly not looking at Willie or Neeta... but especially not Willie. 13:31 <VoxPVoxD> Willie's looking at the fabrics and dresses on the rack, sighing occasionally. It's probably for the best that she doesn't have six figures burning a hole in her personal account right now. This is a form of penance, one supposes. 13:35 <VoxPVoxD> Neeta, meanwhile, is focused on Bob. "Right... okay. I think you want something relatively simple. Not a lot of visual noise, Feminine, light. Let the hat be the statement; let the woman shine through." 13:35 <tom> Bob sniffs, rubs his nose. "Not literally, though, right?" 13:39 <VoxPVoxD> Neeta: "Have you ever seen a stripper in a boater hat, Bob? No. You haven't." 13:40 <VoxPVoxD> "I'll need to call something up from London... when's her birthday?" 13:40 <tom> Bob's clearly thinking about it. 13:40 <tom> Bob: "We have One Week." 13:43 <VoxPVoxD> Neeta: "Ah. Lucky for you, I thrive under pressure. What about something in a midi wrap?" She's pulling samples of fabric and designs out for Bob to look at. https://i.imgur.com/KzlXORU.jpg https://i.imgur.com/3vm3z2s.jpg https://i.imgur.com/7S43Gl2.jpg 13:45 <tom> Bob tries to tune out the women in the pictures to not throw off his decision; it is hard. 13:45 <tom> Finally: "The first one." 13:45 <tom> "I think it goes best with... I don't wanna say it's a plain hat, but it's not... overly... frilly?" 13:45 <VoxPVoxD> Neeta: "Good taste!" 13:46 <tom> "Pfft, you'd say that no matter what I picked..." 13:47 <VoxPVoxD> "It's quite a fine example of quite a simple hat. Outdoorsy, a bit boyish, classically - and these days wearing a hat at all is a Thing. That's why you don't want a noisy dress. Your lovely Mari would be getting lost in the imagery. Wearing the party she wanted to shrink from right on her head and shoulders." 13:47 <VoxPVoxD> She doesn't acknowledge Bob's obviously true observation. 13:48 <tom> He's nodding along to all this. 13:48 <VoxPVoxD> "Right! I'll have something for you on Wednesday, I think. Leave a number?" 13:52 <tom> Bob fumbles with the pen and scribbles something out. 13:54 <VoxPVoxD> On the way out, Willie asks after Andy, and Neeta brushes her off with a "Your guess is as good as mine." From there, there's not much left to do but say goodbyes. 13:54 <VoxPVoxD> Back in the car: "I think that was a lovely choice." 13:54 <tom> "Thank you Neeta. Stay warm!" The doorbell chimes on the way out the door. 13:54 <tom> "Thanks. I really want things to go well." 13:55 <tom> Bob frowns: "She spent her last birthday in a Cheiron cell." 13:55 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "Then this will make her very happy, I hope. She deserves it. You both do." 13:55 <tom> He winces a bit. He's oversharing again- oversharing someone else's shit- ugh! "...So I guess that's not a high bar to cross." 13:56 <tom> He's scratching his knee but doesn't comment on that. 13:56 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "Now, if you're paying, logically you should get to choose where we go for dinner. What are you in the mood for?" 13:56 <tom> "What do the British even eat when no-one's looking?" 13:57 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "Depends on the British. There are many distinct subspecies." 13:57 <tom> "Shit, really? I thought it was just Rolves and Minas." 13:57 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "It can feel that way, sometimes. But no, it's quite a big country, for such a small country." 13:58 <VoxPVoxD> "A great spectrum between parmos and foie gras." 13:58 <tom> "Damn, I'm learning shit every day." 13:59 <tom> Bob cocks his head, picks up his phone: "Mexican's a no-go. I don't want a fucking parmo... you said you went to school in Milan, yeah? They can't possibly fuck up Italian." 14:04 <tom> "Yeah. Okay." Bob taps apps. There's an italian place pretty close... looks reasonably classy... just renovated. Not many reviews yet, looks nice. 14:06 <VoxPVoxD> Willie looks over his shoulder. "Ah! Fumo. I've been meaning to try that since I saw the advertisement. Obviously not a place to bring Sergio, but you and I can be philistines together." 14:06 <tom> "It seems really unfair that they get to live forever but can't have a burger." 14:07 <tom> "A real no-win scenario." 14:07 <VoxPVoxD> "He can eat. He's eaten my cooking! But he's got Sicilian family, you know? I'll take my chances with the vampires ten times before I risk making an Italian angry about food." 14:09 <tom> "Do you think we could get him to frenzy just by, you know, feeding him English cooking?" Bob pinches his fingers and angrily rocks his hands back and forth, muttering angrily in fake-Italian. "Escucha Rolfo Fuckatarde!" 14:10 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "I'd freak out before he did." 14:10 <tom> "Hehehe." 14:10 <VoxPVoxD> "Have you had the Parmo Experience yet?" 14:10 <VoxPVoxD> "Ugh." 14:10 <tom> Bob gulps. "Yes." 14:10 <VoxPVoxD> "You poor dear." 14:11 <tom> "Liam's fetch tried to get me to kill him; he had his... 'mates' hold me down and force-feed me the oiliest chicken I've ever hard until I puked. I have no idea if that helped." 14:11 <tom> "That dude really is the fucking worst." 14:11 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "Oh dear." 14:11 <VoxPVoxD> "But everything's okay now? No bad blood between you and Rolf?" 14:12 <tom> had* 14:12 <tom> "Oh I'm sure someday we'll have it out, but I'm not losing sleep over it." 14:12 <tom> "I got bigger fish to fry and besides, the man knows how to take a punch." 14:12 <tom> "He is so lucky I was unarmed though, luh-mao." 14:12 <VoxPVoxD> "Let's table the topic of Rolf and parmos for now; I want to go in with a full appetite." 14:13 <tom> "Yeah, yeah! Sorry." 14:13 <tom> Bob tugs his collar. 14:14 <VoxPVoxD> Ordinarily you have to call in a reservation, but things are so dire the front of house is delighted to see a walk-in. Bob and Willie get menus. Willie asks Bob, "What kind of wine are you in the mood for? I propose starting with pasta before choosing a main." 14:15 <tom> "Uh, whites are for... fish? I think..." 14:16 <VoxPVoxD> "It's quite a bit more complicated than that. We can work in either direction, pair food to wine or wine to food." 14:17 <tom> Bob isn't a complicated guy, really, but there's something just so off about how desperately eager the staff are to seat him that he's put off a bit. He glances down the menu. "I know a few of these words." 14:18 <tom> "...Used to get really anxious going into an empty restaurant, you know? It just always felt so... scared?" 14:18 <tom> "Do you know what I mean?" 14:18 <tom> "Just a bad vibe." 14:18 <VoxPVoxD> "There was some of that in the dress shop, too. It's like when you visit someone who hasn't had people over in a while and they get really eager to prove they're normal and okay to be around and it kind of puts you off a bit." 14:19 <VoxPVoxD> "Achingly desperate." 14:19 <tom> "Yeah. I fucking... I hate it so bad." 14:19 <tom> Bob: "What goes with steak?" 14:22 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "I would recommend one of the northern reds. The barolo if you're feeling adventurous; the cabernet if you aren't." 14:22 <tom> "...What makes a 'barolo' more adventurous than a cabernet?" 14:23 <tom> Bob holds up the menu and squints. 14:25 <tom> "I wonder how fresh the beef is. A couple places just locked down their freezer over the pandemic, you know, just keeping a frozen pile of meat for when... business picked up again." He actually seems suddenly very pale. 14:25 <tom> He kinda thumps his fist against the table. God damn it, dude. Fuck you. 14:26 <VoxPVoxD> "If you're thinking steak, we should start with the melanzane or maybe the spinach ravioli... cabernets are sort of, the red wine people think of when they think of red wine. Wine brand wine. If you've had wine and didn't hate it, you can drink a cabernet. Barolo's a bit more challenging. Bassy, grippy, Less fruity, more woody and licorice-y. Anise notes." 14:26 <tom> "I don't mind licorice. Let's try it." 14:28 <VoxPVoxD> "Good!" Willie sounds pleased. Once the waiter's come back with a bottle, he'll also take pasta orders. Willie hrms over the menu and decides to go for the truffle ravioli. 14:31 <tom> Bob gets the lobster Ravioli. It's weird as hell to not bother looking at the prices first. 14:32 <VoxPVoxD> Once they're alone again, Willie says, "How are you doing? Really?" 14:32 <tom> "I'm alive, and getting paid." 14:33 <VoxPVoxD> Willie gives her friend a 'come on' look. 14:35 <tom> "I think I'm doing pretty good," he withers a bit. "Hey, you know, c'mon, it's not like... really anything different. I mean I'm getting mind-melted by all sorts of vampires and shit..." 14:36 <VoxPVoxD> "I know the feeling." 14:36 <tom> "...He's respecting your boundaries, right?" 14:37 <VoxPVoxD> Willie smiles a bit ruefully. "Too well, if anything." 14:37 <tom> Bob's still waiting for someone to come by and take his entree order; he will be getting the most expensive steak on the menu, something called a 'Tomahawk'. 14:38 <tom> "He must be riding high after he basically prospected the crew that brought Ruthie back." 14:39 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "That's not how it works. They don't— like you know the baseline level of indulgent contempt you expect everyone to treat you with?" 14:40 <tom> "Of course I know it, it's like half my personality." 14:41 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "Well, that's how they actually treat Sergio. He seems almost surplus to requirements. Ornamental. An amusement." She says this neutrally, as if she were describing an Attenborough documentary rather than the man she loves and the monsters who own him. 14:42 <VoxPVoxD> "Simpson reassured him that he would not be expected to fight, if war came between the Court in residence and the Court in exile." 14:44 <tom> "Well that's great, actually. I'd feel bad about having to drop him if he went after Letitia or something." 14:44 <VoxPVoxD> "Would you really?" 14:44 <tom> Bob is sensing the air as he speaks; Willie's seen him like this before, when he was discussing the Tatterdam. "She is important for reasons." 14:46 <tom> "Would I what, would I shoot your boy? Shit, I don't wanna... but it's like you said, you know," He'll sip the complementary glass of water until the wine arrives. 14:47 <tom> "Blood slave." 14:47 <tom> "I wonder if he could just beast mode through it if you were in danger?" 14:47 <tom> "Does it work like that?" 14:50 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "When he was telling me about the introduction to Inchcape, before he knew, and before he knew *I* knew, I told him I had a guy who would defend me if the elders got violent." 14:50 <VoxPVoxD> "He thought I meant him, and he screwed up his courage and said, 'yeah, you do'. I'll never forget how surprised he looked at himself." 14:50 <VoxPVoxD> "I don't know if the mind or body would obey, in a critical moment... but his heart is there. He's such a sweet man." 14:50 <VoxPVoxD> "He deserves so much better." 14:50 <tom> Bob smiles, gives a little fist pump. "I am such a good judge of character." 14:51 <VoxPVoxD> Dryly: "More or less." 14:51 <tom> "Damn I can't wait to fuck up once and instantly die." 14:53 <VoxPVoxD> Willie orders the porchetta, and a pizza to split. It comes out to less than Bob's tomahawk so it's fair game, that. She's very adept at spending other men's money in nice restaurants. "It shows." 14:53 <VoxPVoxD> "You've got something on your mind." 14:54 <tom> "Sure, of course. A grenade that automatically activates if a wizard tries to redirect it in mid-air. Just needs a gyroscope and a standard time-delay fuze." 14:55 <VoxPVoxD> Willie chews her pasta, looking at Bob with a deadpan expression. 14:55 <tom> "A cut-down fifty cal with a short stock. Take off the back of the receiver and turn it into a recoilless rifle. Useless outside of short range, but, hah, the looks on their fucking faces." 14:55 <tom> "I got all sorts of thoughts." 14:56 <VoxPVoxD> "Meat thoughts." 14:56 <tom> He annihilates a bowl of lobster-stuffed ravioli. 14:56 <tom> "Ahaha, yeah," Bob chews for a second while he tries to come up with something. 15:00 <tom> And just keeps on chewing, looking increasingly crestfallen as he gets nothing. 15:00 <tom> Then the steak comes out; by the time the waitress is stepping away he's just kinda looking at it with downcast eyes. 15:00 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "Bob..." 15:01 <tom> He takes the unfinished bit of food out of his mouth into a napkin and inhales as he sets it next to the plate. 15:01 <tom> "I asked Suzie a bit about the job." 15:01 <tom> "She could be lying I guess." 15:02 <VoxPVoxD> "But whatever she said has clearly had an effect." 15:02 <tom> "They were stacked up like frozen meat." 15:03 <tom> "She said they were still breathing when VI ran off with them." 15:03 <VoxPVoxD> Cutting into her pork: "The Gardeners' victims, you mean." 15:03 <tom> "Yeah." 15:04 <VoxPVoxD> "I wonder why Ruth did that. Was she anticipating having to go further to ground? Was she squirreling them away for winter? Were Alex's appetites that far gone?" 15:04 <tom> "It's too late to do anything about it now." 15:04 <VoxPVoxD> Willie shrugs. "I could ask." 15:04 <tom> "Our vampire expert clearly doesn't give a shit." 15:05 <tom> "Oh, you could ask? What, so Sergio can go-" Bob furrows his brow, scrunches his face, tries to slick his hair into a shitty widow's peak: "I simply must ask Simpson about this." 15:05 <tom> "Save it, Willie. You'll just get him in deeper shit for your trouble." 15:05 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "Yeah, I'd rather not involve him." 15:06 <tom> "Oh, you're just... gonna roll in and ask the Grinch herself, then?" 15:06 <VoxPVoxD> "Though I think Simpson would furnish him *some* explanation." 15:06 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "I don't know what I'm going to do. Maybe nothing." 15:06 <tom> Bob swallows: "And that's why I... I really didn't want to tell you about it." 15:07 <tom> "You're just gonna feel bad. Nothing we can do now." 15:07 <tom> "You know what was the best feeling in the world, though?" 15:07 <tom> "The only good thing I've ever felt, like, in forever." 15:07 <VoxPVoxD> Willie, who feels fine: "Do tell." 15:08 <tom> "Meeting Sumi and just... picking up Mari by her shoulders and being like 'I brought this home'." 15:08 <tom> He mimes picking up a small object and placing it on the table. 15:08 <VoxPVoxD> "A real hero." 15:08 <tom> "It felt nice. Not gonna lie." 15:09 <tom> "I don't know what Simpson and his freaks did with them." 15:09 <VoxPVoxD> "Are doing." 15:09 <tom> "What I'd really like to do is take them home." 15:10 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "If I can think of something to do besides make it worse, I'll let you know." 15:10 <VoxPVoxD> "I certainly won't sit and twist in the wind until you drag it out of me." 15:10 <tom> Bob stabs his steak with his fork and starts cutting into it. "Am I that pathetic?" 15:11 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "No, you aren't. Despite your best efforts." 15:12 <tom> "I really hate those fucking guys." 15:12 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "A lot of people agree with you." 15:12 <tom> "So why'd we make them stronger?" 15:13 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "Because I'm weak." 15:13 <tom> Bob lowers his head to his folded hands, resting his mouth against his thumbs. "No, you're being smart." 15:13 <tom> "Fuck man, I really don't wanna say Rolf and Badawi were right." 15:14 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "I don't think they were. I didn't then. I don't now. But I didn't have it in me to stand up to them, to try and get people to commit to doing the right thing instead of the safe thing." 15:15 <VoxPVoxD> "So, yeah. Weak. Not smart." 15:15 <tom> "Well then I'm weak with you." He pours himself a glass of wine and offers up his glass to clink against hers. 15:15 <tom> "...Are you gonna be good to drive?" 15:16 <VoxPVoxD> Willie clinks her glass. "It's two glasses of wine. I can switch to tonic if you're nervous." 15:16 <VoxPVoxD> "This is not a way in which I am weak." 15:16 <tom> He waves dismissively. "You drive better drunk than Rolf sober." 15:17 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "Don't say that in front of anyone else." 15:17 <VoxPVoxD> "But I agree." 15:18 <tom> "God I cannot believe I couldn't find a weed dealer at Samhain." 15:18 <tom> "I must be really losing my touch." 15:18 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "If you find a connection, I demand you deal me in. Doubly so if it's magic." 15:19 <VoxPVoxD> The waiter drops off the check. 15:19 <tom> "Oh, no doubt. They have got to have some wicked psychadelics. So far the only thing I've had is... they call it.... fuckin'.... goblin tea?" 15:19 <tom> "Kinda sucked honestly." 15:20 <tom> Bob snaps up the check and writes up a generous tip. 15:20 <VoxPVoxD> Willie looks down at the cheque. "I'll take your word for it, but I deeply want to try some faerie drugs. Do let me know." 15:21 <VoxPVoxD> "May I impose you further? One last thing?" 15:21 <tom> Bob steadies himself. "Yeah?" 15:22 <VoxPVoxD> Willie: "Keep all the secrets you like. You don't owe me the contents of your head or heart, no matter how deep our friendship. But by now I'm sure you've observed that trying to keep things from me for my benefit... doesn't work. It never works. It just hurts us both." 15:22 <VoxPVoxD> "So if you find yourself doing that... I urge you to reconsider." 15:23 <VoxPVoxD> "I want you to trust me like I trust you." 15:24 <tom> He looks a little pained for a moment. "Yeah it's just... you know, Mina, I don't wanna tell you something that gets you hurt. I really couldn't live with myself." 15:25 <tom> "I can live with being a piece of shit. But I can't... I don't..." He's grasping at straws. 15:26 <VoxPVoxD> Willie wants to reach out to him, but the desire doesn't even reach the surface of her mind, let alone her hands. 15:26 <VoxPVoxD> "Okay." 15:26 <VoxPVoxD> "That's all I wanted to say." 15:26 <VoxPVoxD> "You ready to go? I've had a lovely day." 15:27 <tom> Bob's expression is already stony. The ripples are all gone and the pond is still. He flashes that cold, empty smile. "Yeah, let's go."